Transforming mental blocks

This week I attended an online workshop called “The Mindset Detox” given by Liz Dawn, of Celebrate Your Life, and Emily Manning. It centered on addressing one mindset block, that is a part of you that protected or served you in the past, but no longer does. I focused on my self-doubt of my healing gifts. I want to share two exercises that had a profound impact.

Transforming blocks

The first was about inquiry into the block. To start, we were asked to connect with our core self, that I call our divine self. This is the grounded and wise self that’s connected to the divine. Then, we were asked to imagine that that block had a physical form and is sitting or standing next to you. Next, we were asked to have a conversation, asking him what was going on in order to understand its role in my life. The goal was not to eliminate this part but uncover the gift it provided (that is how it protected), and ultimately tease out how it could serve today and thus integrate into my core self. As a result of the exercise, I realized that my self-doubt was simply trying to keep me safe, thus initiating for me a process of transformation.

The other exercise was focused on thoughts, feelings, and actions. We were asked to write the thoughts that arise from the block, the resultant feelings, and the associated actions taken. Then, we were asked to write their counter-parts, the thoughts, feelings, and actions coming out of this transformed “block” that would now serve. Finally, we were asked to visualize ourselves in a situation where this block might previously have been triggered, but, as a result of its transformation, results in a positive experience. Liz went on to explain that doing this exercise for at least 21-days creates new neural pathways in the brain to support this change. She also explained that it may also occur subtly, whereupon one day you might notice that you are responding differently.

The workshop was an amazing experience and I am so grateful to Liz and Emily for offering it. At the end, they mentioned that they are offering a more intensive 28-day workshop, called “The Mindset Makeover,” starting May 15. If you are interested, here’s a link to the Celebrate Your Life website that provides more details: The Mindset Makeover.


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Can’t see the forest for the trees

You can’t see the forest for the trees.

Have you ever felt so focused on project details or tasks that you forgot about the higher-level intent for them? In 1546, John Heywood documented the metaphor, “You can’t see the forest for the trees.” That metaphor jumped out at me this morning as a result of messages I received from my spirit guides and angels.

As I’ve written before, I both am a spirit healer and becoming one. In the last few months, I’ve been taking a course on becoming an angel guide and a seminar on developing my spiritual gifts. But one thing I’d forgotten over those months is that I’ve been mostly functioning at the detail level and had not taken much time to step back from the tasks and view things from a higher perspective.

For the last twenty-some years, working in the documentation department of software companies, the software’s complexity required that I carefully document the details. However, when I became a manager, I was also responsible for translating company strategies so that writers could apply them to their daily work. So, I had to view my work from both the detail level and the higher level. By the end of my time with the company, I was able to balance them.

Now, as most of my time is dedicated to my calling, I was reminded today that I was imbalanced again. I was focusing on the details, in this case, the courses and my writing. The message to me was to step back to a higher view (the forest view from the metaphor), and simply attend to being connected to the divine realm, really feeling it moment by moment. That requires that I trust that my guides and angels let me know when the details need attending.

Looking at your own life, are you balanced between the details and a higher view? This could be about your work, but also your relationships, your finances, and even your own calling. Sometimes, taking the time to step back from the details and reflect gives you a chance to determine if your current direction and choices are in line with how you want to live.


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From a fear of God to a Divine connection

Growing up Catholic, I was taught about fearing God, often at the expense of teachings about a loving God.  From my theological studies, I know that the original Hebrew words, that were translated into fear, could also mean awe, reverence, and respect. The sad result of translating them as fear for me and so many others is that God and even Jesus became unreachable because our feelings of fear turned into feelings of unworthiness and separateness.

From my counseling studies, and from personal experience, I know that a fearful person closes down to protect him or herself from harm. When felt in relation to the divine, in effect, that person is protecting themself from God and thus limiting their ability to feel love and support.

Various spiritual teachers have talked about how fear can hinder our connection to the divine. In his book, Angels Whisper in My Ear, Kyle Gray writes about people pleading for help from angels but feeling like they are hitting a wall. I suspect that often desperation and fear underly that. And believe me, I know that from personal experience too. Now, you never want to imply someone’s feelings are wrong, because they aren’t. They just are. However, if you let the fear or desperation be in control, you are more limited because you are closed down. Kyle suggests that rather than pleading for help with angels, expect help from them, because that in fact is their role. I love that idea because it sort of turns things around – both recognizing your feelings but also acknowledging that you are more than your feelings.  This in turn, opens you up for a deeper connection with the divine, including feeling their support.

Recently, I became aware that I still have some walls up with the divine, even though I chat with God, guides, and angels, every day. I likely built those walls in response to childhood fears. While the walls served me as a child, as an adult they only limit my connection with the divine and my use of my spiritual gifts. I’m still puzzling through the nature of those walls with my divine teachers. But without a doubt, I know that as these walls start to crumble, my connection will deepen exponentially.

My wish and prayer for all of you who were taught to fear God is that you can release that limiting belief, and truly feel your innate connection with the divine and their support, enabling your gifts to more fully emerge.


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Your worthiness: Do you feel it?

I had a powerful experience last week that I hesitated to share with you because I was unsure whether it would be of value for your spiritual journey. But today, via Angel cards, the angels challenged me to share it.

As mentioned in my story, for many years I struggled with low self-esteem. I didn’t realize until recently, that even though I believe that I’m good and worthy in my mind, somewhere further down, I still felt unworthy. And I discovered that this also impacted my relationship with the divine.

As you know from my other blogs, I talk to my guides, God, and angels every day, seeking their guidance and support. When I receive it, I always thank them. But I just realized that I repeatedly thank them for the same guidance, as if I didn’t deserve it. In a way, I believed that helping me was taking them away from helping someone worthy.

Feeling worthy

Coming to this realization, I turned to my guides and God to help me work through this. Last Thursday, I also turned to my soul coach. He guided me through an exercise where I came upon my toddler self, curled up in a ball, trying to remain unnoticed and stay safe. During the exercise I was invited to speak to the toddler, telling him he was loved, good, and worthy. By the end of the exercise, as I hugged him tightly, I knew he felt it.

Later that day, I became aware that I felt worthy. I was surprised. In fact, for the next few days, I kept checking to see if I still felt it, as if I was afraid it was fleeting. But it was there and as strong as ever. With this feeling came the awareness that my fears of not being good enough or getting in trouble (to name two), which I have tried to heal for so long, lost their foundation when I no longer felt unworthy. What a relief!

Now, I’m not saying that my fears have vanished completely. However, when they arise, I tap into my worthiness and allow it to enfold the fear and help it dissipate.

I’ll end by hoping that this story reminds you of your innate worthiness. May it be the foundation upon which you thrive.


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The Greatest Gift

Growing up Catholic was wonderful in that it gave me a grounding in faith, established a belief in God, and emphasized the importance of prayer. Unfortunately, at the time, prayer for me seemed limited to memorized words. While I was sincere when I recited them, they weren’t personal enough. In college, a friend gave me the greatest gift when she told me that prayer can be as simple as a conversation with God.

I vividly recall the time I spent in the campus chapel spilling my guts to God about my struggles, questions about faith and relationships, and even my purpose. I didn’t know how God would answer, but speaking out loud to God was cathartic. After a few months, I realized that my relationship with God had begun to change, experiencing God less as one who judged and more as one who listened and loved. Through these chats, God had become my confidant and friend.

Eventually, I came to recognize that these apparently one-side chats were not one sided at all as God’s responses had been coming to me through unexpected encounters. One important one occurred when a friend asked if I would host his friend at my apartment for a few days. My intuition told me to say yes. That yes, led me joining a prayer group and ultimately led to my decision to become a priest. You can read more about that in my story.

Today, I still have daily chats, not only with God, but with spiritual guides and most recently angels. Their responses come from many avenues. For example, they come from people, like my husband or soul coach, suggesting a book, and from conversations with friends. They also come from music, movies, dreams, Oracle, Tarot, and Angel cards, and even emails. Finally, I often get them during our chats, not only from my intuition, but through words and phrases that pop into my head that I know are not from me.

Truly my friend’s suggestion in college was the greatest gift. I think of her and thank her regularly, as this gift led me to where I am today. If you have ever felt your spiritual life somewhat stymied because you don’t know how to connect with God, give chatting a try, and be open to whatever happens.

We are one Divine Essence

I just posted a writing about this topic in the context of an angel guide course I’m currently taking in February 2022. As only blog posts result in automatic notifications to my readers, I’m posting this blog with a snippet of the writing and a link to the complete writing. Be aware that because this is not a blog post it’s longer, about 800 words.

Writing snippet

In other writings I stated my belief that we, as humans, are incarnated divine beings, just as Jesus was. I’ll write about the uniqueness of Jesus, or Jeshua as I call him, at another time.

As divine beings, we are all one and a part of God. We share the same divine essence. In my course of Angels, Kyle Gray talked about that same oneness. He used the metaphor that God or our higher power is the heart and angels are the heart beats. He also said that angels and humans are expressed thoughts of God. Personally, those metaphors didn’t immediately resonate with me.

Releasing Beliefs that Limit You

I release you.

It’s been about a month since I was laid off. Since then, I’ve been writing blogs, reading about spiritual guides, and enrolled in two webinars, one for clutter clearing (towards letting go of material things that limit me) and another about becoming an angel guide. All of this has been in service of growing as a healer of the spirit, aka spirit healer or spiritual coach, and expanding what I offer on this website.

As I do so, old beliefs still pop up. Some include: fear that I’m doing “it” wrong; fear that I’m not doing enough; fear of getting in trouble; not trusting my guides and God; falling into the fight or flight reaction when something new is thrown my way; jumping to a future moment (like what do I have to do in an hour) rather than being fully present in the moment; and finally over-thinking. That’s some list, huh. And of course, now I have to add feeling shame for such a long list.

Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Pexels.com

In the past, when those came up, I learned that denying them doesn’t make them go away but fester, like an untended wound. So, I’ve tried to acknowledge them and move past them. But I realized that I needed another way to handle them and turned to my guides. The phrase that they suggested I use is “I release you.” And when I say it, truly feel that I am releasing the limitation. When I do this, I do feel a release.

Does the limitation go away permanently? No, it doesn’t or it hasn’t so far. But like my intentions that I repeat every day during meditation, I believe that repeating the “I release you phrase” also reinforces my intention to move on from those things that limit my life and living my calling.

Do you have limitations or beliefs that keep popping up, even after having worked on removing them? If so, the next time they come up, give “I release you” a try and see what happens.

Addendum, 2/14/22: I had another thought about this. As mentioned I’ve done a lot of inner work on my fears and feelings of inadequacy. As a result, I understand how they came about and what triggers them. To ensure that I don’t fall into denying them and thus swallowing any of these feelings, I’ve added a phrase before “I release you.” Now I say, I understand you and I release you.” That way I acknowledge the feelings and then let them go.

You don’t have to do everything

As a workaholic and perfectionist in recovery, I developed a habit of pushing myself hard to do everything. After years of therapy and twelve-step work, I learned mostly to let go of that. When it comes to living my calling as a healer of the spirit, I must admit that it still creeps in. For example, I may sign up for a workshop even though it wouldn’t work well with my schedule, because I falsely believed I wasn’t doing enough.

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Repeatedly, in talking to my guides and God, I’ve been reminded to trust them. Recently though, I realized that for the most part my trust was somewhat limited to acknowledging their support and love. It didn’t include understanding that I don’t have to do this calling alone in terms of actions. While I must take actions, and do, like attend workshops, write blogs, and so on, I must also believe that my guides and God are taking actions on my behalf. In other words, it’s not 100% on my shoulders.

Have you been in a similar situation, believing that God or your guides support you, but think that it all rests on you? As part of our calling, we are asked to let go and allow them to do too.

So, what might they do? While they certainly can’t submit applications or a resume, if you are looking for a new job, they can bring your attention to opportunities or people that might make your work easier. For example, a friend might mention work that you hadn’t thought about or note a skill you have that is marketable. For me, as I continue living and learning as a healer of the spirit, it might be directing a spiritual teacher my way or a potential client.

The bottom line is that I and you are part of a team with God and our guides. So, we don’t have to do everything by ourselves.

Peace and blessings to everyone.

Finding a new beat

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Has a song ever come on the radio, on your playlist, over the speakers in a mall, and you find your body starting to move to the song’s beat at its own accord? It’s such a freeing and wonderful feeling to just let your body move as it wants.

For many, we develop a certain beat or rhythm to our lives, like the time we get up in the morning, when we eat, and what we do during the day. Now that it’s about a week past my last day at my job after my layoff, I find myself in need of a new beat. Over the last years, I developed a rhythm to my days, with my weekdays molded around my work, start and stop times, and recurring department meetings. My weekends were organized around down time, handling household tasks, and perhaps seeing friends.

What happens when there’s a significant life change, whether from being laid off, moving to a new town, experiencing the death of a loved one, and even the pandemic? These changes can be destabilizing and uncomfortable.  In response, some might want to rush to create a new rhythm to avoid the discomfort. I’ve been there myself.

This time, for me, I want to let my spirit find the new rhythm naturally. Aware of the tasks ahead of me, my goals, and even my dreams, I’m trying to stay in the present, and trust my guides and God that a new beat or rhythm will emerge; one that resonates with my spirit and allows it to thrive.

So, that means being uncomfortable. As mentioned in other blogs, for so long I relied solely on my mind. So, the challenge to me and to you, if you are facing a disruption, is to live with the discomfort and let the new rhythm evolve naturally.

Like, Gloria Estefan sang many years ago, “the rhythm is gonna get you.”

Addendum: I woke up in the middle of the night following my posting this blog and Calum Scott’s song, ”Rhythm Inside, ” was going through my head. While the song is about finding love, for me, it’s also about letting your new rhythm arise, and moving to that rhythm as you live and love. Ironically, last night before I went to sleep I prayed to my visit my guides wanting to visit with them while I slept. This is one thing that emerged.

Presents and Presence

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In this season leading up to Christmas and the exchange of presents, I find it interesting that what’s been on my mind recently is presence, specifically, being fully present each moment of every day. For the last two months, this has been one of my intentions. Growing up as a trauma survivor, to ensure my safety, I always planned, trying to anticipate what might happen and how to respond. As a result, I was future focused. Yet, in my spiritual studies, time and again I heard about the importance of being present.

Over many years I tried to embrace that. While I was a religious, I asked God to help me be present with parishioners, and to those I ministered to and with. As a therapist-in-training, my intention was to walk with my clients as they sought healing. As a manager, a key goal was to listen to my employees’ hopes and challenges. And, of course, as a husband, I endeavor to be fully present with Michael, as he shares the events of his day, and his frustrations and successes.

This morning, while meditating, I realized that much of my intention was outwardly focused. With that awareness, came the awareness that in order to be fully present, I needed to be present with myself too. At first, I thought that meant being fully present in the tasks that I’m doing, whether I’m folding a blanket, washing the dishes, or doing some activity. But, I realized that to a degree those are outwardly focused too.

So, what does being fully present with myself look like? Might it be tuning into where I am physically, emotionally, and spiritually? Might it be taking time to sit quietly without doing anything, and just seeing what comes to mind or heart? Might it be just being with intention, noticing and noting things and people who I pass every day? I would say all of that, but somehow I know there’s more. What do you think?

My sense, though, is that as I and you become more fully present with ourselves, we can more easily be fully present with others. What a great present that would be during this Christmas season!